I'm calling to you again. Can you hear me? I'm Sophia, your muse, and I know your heart intimately. I know the beating of it, its darkest secrets and wildest dreams. I am here once again to…

Wait. What's that? There's a sound echoing from deep within the forest. The earth shakes from the pounding of heavy feet trudging towards me. Wind reeks of their foul smells. Obscene voices are yelling my name. I can see them! Hideous hunched bodies covered in shaggy, filthy hair. Monstrous heads, tusks protruding from their mouths. They want to steal me away, freeze your world, so that liquid imagination no longer flows. Help me! I must hide.


Me Gwern. Me and Klac and our buddies take lady. She no bother no one now. No more runny cree-ay-tiv stuff. All frozen now. And her always sneaky, no wanting to say who her is. Always teasing. But no more. We grab her as she run away, wrap her up in old hides, keep her on ice until her ready to say who her really is. Sophia, muse, bah! Enough of her.

She messed with poems already, so don't go there. But we stopped that snake charming muse before her ruin whole site. We in control now. You listen to Gwern The Troll. No more Sophia sorceress muse lady. Gwern tell you what you need to know. No one write ever again. No pictures. No stories. No site unless stupid lady caves into me and my pals.

Troll Contest Stories
Poetry and Art Collaboration